Mnemonic 2009 - Please Vote

We've completed the 2nd annual mnemonic contest for the eras or periods of the geological time line. I run this contest in my course EEMB 102 (Macroevolution), which has about 160 students. Both years I've been amazed at the diversity and creativity of mnemonics. I also pick some of my favorites and post them here, for people to vote on, the top vote-getter receives extra credit. Last year's blog entry I named "Sex, drugs, and macroevolution" because sex and drugs were the most common themes of the mnemonics. This year is similar, but more variable, and there are still a few other themes that are common. I. My favoirtes tended to be about life as a UCSB undergraduate, I'll list those first. II. Second, perhaps because last year's winner was inspired by Lord of the Rings, I got quite a few inspired by movies, TV shows, and books. III. Just like last year, quite a few about sex and drugs. I suppose that could be put into the category of life as a UCSB student, too.

By the way, last year's winner was:

Cruel Mordor, perilous place
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quest too crucial, jeopardous task,
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Persistently pursuing Mount
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Doom, Sauron’s orcs challenge.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]


AND THIS YEARS NOMINEES ARE (Please vote by number at right):
1) Floatopia (Floatopia is an ad hoc spring break 'event' where thousands flooded the beach near UCSB, without bathrooms or trashcans, but with lots of alchohol and makeshift water craft)

Chugging quickly, towing my craft, juggling thirtypacks
(Cenozoic - quaternary, tertiary. Mesozoic - cretaceous, jurassic, triassic)
Professionally partying patrons made drunken sexual outbursts constantly
(Paleozoic - permian, pennsylvanian, mississipian, devonian, silurian, ordovician, cambrian)

2) Here is what I meant about no bathrooms at floatopia
Can men pee publically?
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quiet tinkling can justify tickets
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Prompt police measure
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Defined strictly: obscene conduct
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian

3) And c'mon, everyone Poops, even UCSB undergraduates
Center My Pale Posterior
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quickly, Towards Commode, Joyous Tenement,
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Porcelain Palace: Marred.
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Done. Sigh Of Contentment.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

4) And what if you got hold of some back poultry before Floatopia?
Contamination Makes People Puke
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Question Tasting Chicken Just Tainted
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Purple Poultry Makes
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Doctors Stay On Call
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

5) Surfing inspired
Continually maintaining powerful paddles
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quick through currents, just timing
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Positioned positively my
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Dank surfboard owns crests
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

6) At UCSB, students work hard
Cramming, memorizing, pondering plentiful,
Quizzes, tests: curriculum's just terrible.
Preferably pursuing merriment,
Disaronno shots obliterate conscience.

7) And party hard:
College manufactures plentiful parties,
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quenching the countless juveniles' thirsts,
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Producing prolific merriment,
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Discouraging studying or coursework.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

8) Usually looking for love:
Chasing Mind-blowing Pretty Person
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quickly to Create Joyous Time
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Pursuing Phenomenal Match
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Mississippian]
Dumbfounded, Stupefied, obtained call!
[Devonian, silurian, ordovician, cambrian]

9). Despite the distractions, some still notice nature's beauty:
California mountain peaks plenty quiet,
(Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic, Quarternary)
The clouds jacket the pristine peaks,
(Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic, Permian, Pennsylvanian)
Morning drizzle sweeps over crests.
(Mississippian, Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian)


II. Some of the best movie, music or TV-inspired mnemonics are also nominees.

10) Inspired by The Family Guy:
Cartoonist, MacFarlane, presents plot:
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quagmire takes Chinese, Japanese, Thai
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
prostitutes plus Meg.
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Devious Stewie organizes crime.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

11) The Office
Clever Mockumentary Paper People.
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Question... That's Classy Jim, Talented Pennsylvanian Paper Merchant?
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic, Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Dwight Schrute Openly Counters.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

12) Monty Python
Crazy Monty Python pack,
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Questions to cross junction through,
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Pardon pompous Malapert,
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian]
Deliver Shrubbery on Crusade,
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

13) A TV show starring Brett Michaels of Poison “Rock of Love with Bret Michaels”
Crude Michaels promotes Poison.
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
“Quality” television created just to
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Pick promiscuous moms
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Mississippian]
During several obscene competitions.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

14) Pokemon (I assume Quagsire and Jigglypuff are actual Pokemon characters)
Come My Pokemon Pets
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quagsire, Togepi, Clefairy, Jigglypuff, Tentacool
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Play Pocket Monsters!
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisipian]
Do Something Or Cease.
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

15). Harry Potter
Creepy Magicians Practice Playing Quidditch To Curse, Jinx, Terrorize, Plunder, Pilage Mr Draco's Secret Organized Club.
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic, Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic, Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian, Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

16). Cold Play
Chris Martin Plays Piano
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic]
Quickly Turning Coldplay's Joint's Triumphant
[Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic]
Paramore Plays Misery
[Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisipian]
Discussing Sorrows Of Children
[Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]

17). Star Wars
C-3PO's mini pal's Princess quest takes courageous Jedi trainee past perils, making Dark Side order collapse.
[Cenozoic, Mesozoic, Paleozoic, Proterozoic, Quaternary, Tertiary, Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic, Permian, Pennsylvanian, Missisippian, Devonian, Silurian, Ordovician, Cambrian]


III. And of course sex and drugs. (If you are not over 18, if you are offended by explicit sexual material, or if sex is illegal in your state, read no further!!)

18). Overnight Company
Carry Me, Proud Philanderer,
[Cenozoic Mesozoic Paleozoic Proterozoic]
Questing To Conquer Juicy Twat.
[Quaternary Tertiary Cretaceous Jurassic Triassic]
Promised Pleasure? Maybe.
[Permian Pennsylvanian Missisippian]
Don't Speak, Overnight Company.
[Devonian Silucian Ordovician Cambrian ]

19). Curious Men
Curious Men, Past Plastered
Queer Trannys Come Jovially To
Play, Probably Married,
Double-Sided, and Outta the Closet

20). Serious XXX
Charlie munches pink pussy
quickly till Carey Jane's
tight pink pussy makes
Dean skeet on Carey.

21). The scene: people smoking a joint... near them, a poster for an anti-drug campaign.
Cannabis Makes People Paranoid.
"Quite The Contrary," John Thought,
Peacefully Passing Marijuana,
Doubting Some Outsider's Confusion.